Compassionate Inquiry and IFS

The two modalities that changed my world.

One of the complimentary modalities of Internal Family Systems was created by Dr. Gabor Mate, and it is called Compassionate inquiry. Dr. Mate, who was a medical doctor for forty years, was exposed to a seminar on childhood development based on a 2015 study done by Kaiser. The study looked at something called A.C.E scores, or adverse childhood experience scores. The study found that the more scores a person had, or the more adverse experiences they had as a child, the more likely they were to experience substance abuse, chronic illness, and incarceration. The adverse childhood experience scorecard consists of items like having a divorced parent, witnessing domestic abuse, experiencing physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, having an addicted family member, and having someone in the household go to prison. It was shown in the study that if a person had 4 or more of these experiences, they were more likely to find themselves in the less-than-favorable conditions mentioned above. This finding profoundly spoke to Dr. Mate, given that much of his work had surrounded chronic illness and addiction. Dr. Mate shifted gears and began writing extensively on the topics of reimagining society to incorporate the findings from the study. If we look at the issue of chronic illness, Dr. Mate pointed out, that many of the diseases are being treated with steroids, which is effectively cortisol, the stress hormone. In other words, given that the chronic illness may have taken root in a stressful childhood experience, we are treating stress with more stress. This is one of the examples that Dr. Mate uses to illustrate the idea that we have completely missed the mark as a society. If we look at people who are addicted to substances as people deserving of prison time, we fail to see that that person may have experienced a trauma in their upbringing that led them to start using drugs in the first place. If we treated that individual with the love and compassion they need, rather than with punishment, we would get to the root of the issue much faster than if we merely locked that person away for several years. Dr. Mate’s work has inspired his followers and students to turn their lens away from the criminal to the ecological environment that has led that person to crime. In a society that treats the criminal as someone to be punished rather than someone to be treated, the issue takes on a much more tragic scope.

Compassionate inquiry was designed by Dr. Mate to investigate the deeper causes of our suffering. On the surface, our behavior is driven by unmet needs, but if that behavior is maladaptive to your environment, there may be a deeper-seated pain that is asking for attention. When working with Dr. Mate or with a trained professional, the work of the facilitator is to inquire with the patient as to what the origins of the emotion behind the behavior might be. Other such questions include inquiring where in the body the emotion lives and using the imagination to free the body area- whether through breathing, lightly touching, or in some other way expressing what needs to be expressed. It is an incredibly powerful concept that when we release the trapped emotions that are caused by adverse childhood experiences, we can bring to a halt even the most destructive recurring patterns in our lives. In some instances, getting to the emotional root has instantaneously relieved a patient of chronic pain or discomfort. It is fascinating and important that the world begins to see the world of incarceration, medicine, and substance recovery in this light. In a documentary that Dr. Mate made called “The Wisdom of Trauma,” he mentions that in most medical schools, the concept of trauma is hardly spoken of. Additionally, the work of people Resmaa Manakem has taken the somatic work of releasing stored trauma in the body as a way to end police brutality and issues surrounding race in the United States as well. In his book, “My Grandmother’s Hands,” Resmaa refers to the idea that trauma can get passed down through society, through generations of family members, and the DNA of the parent. Stress is captured physiologically and can live in the bodies of families for several generations. This points to the fact that it is essential to address the incredibly painful centuries of slavery from a physiological standpoint so that we can stop being driven unconsciously by trauma-induced triggers. This incredibly important topic applies to all other areas of global, interpersonal, and generational conflict. Resmaa points to some very practical exercises that can be used to support the release of trapped emotions, as well as regulate the nervous system of individuals, communities, and nations at large.

I found it incredibly interesting how closely related the methods of IFS and Compassionate Inquiry were, and whether the two modalities arrive at the same destination or are different, they point to the fundamental idea that humans are good and that life’s events create blocks in our natural functioning. These blocks can create destructive patterns as we make attempts to call for help and love in our behavior, and it is only when we address the deepest needs of society with this understanding that we will finally realize the message of people like Jesus, Buddha, and other spiritual teachers.

Earlier, we mentioned the paradox that we can have all of these trapped emotions and parts that are behaving destructively and all of these societal implications that are completely missing the mark while simultaneously holding the spiritual truth that our nature is perfection, bliss, love, and harmony. At any given moment, we can reach into our core being and realize this truth for ourselves. This would be aligned with the practice of Zen, which posits that any given moment can be the moment of enlightenment. There is a great story of a young student who inquires with his teacher as to when he will become enlightened. The teacher told him ten years. The young student replied that he would work twice as hard as the other monks and asked how long it would take then. The teacher replied that it would take 20 years. Perplexed, the student inquired why the time had doubled, and the teacher said that if he always had one eye on the goal, then he could only ever have one eye on the practice. In A Course In Miracles, the holy spirit instructs the practitioner to recite to themselves, “This instant is my release.” Salvation, in this respect, is available to the seeker when they decide to ignore the prompt of the ego that salvation is behind some event in the future. The choice to see is ours to make now.