Reflections on Nehemiah 8:10
“The joy of the Lord is my strength.”
When I was growing up, I was (and still am) a Jim Carrey super fan. I did my best to model his syntax, style, and behaviors in every which way. I would capitalize on every opportunity to make a face or drop one of his infamous one-liners. To this day, these inside jokes are still incredible sources of laughter for me.
Looking back, I ultimately associated being like Jim Carrey as a fun and exciting way to make a difference in the world. In much the same way that Jim has a talent for portraying the green man in the movie “The Mask,” I had an incredible talent for integrating his comedic style into my sense of identity. However, my version of the mask stopped serving its purpose in elementary school when it began attracting negative attention. I would get bullied on the playground for having no self-control, and after sufficient trips to the principal’s office, I was eventually diagnosed with ADHD.
I remember my Dad, who has undiagnosed ADHD, brought me into his office to show me a list of celebrities and successful people who were also neurodivergent. To my relief, Jim Carrey was one of them. Despite feeling hope that my idol shared what the doctors were saying I had, I found it hard to escape the idea that something was wrong with me.
Years later, while I was in high school, I felt terrified to miss a dose of Adderal (lest my old troublesome self make another destructive appearance). Fortunately, amidst my disarray and emotional turbulence, I discovered a commencement speech given by Jim Carrey on YouTube. I wrote the speech down, word for word, and pasted it above my bed so that I could read it each night before drifting off to sleep. The video started with Jim reflecting… “ I watched the effect that my father’s joy and humor had on the world around me and thought, ‘That’s something to do, that’s something worth my time.” I could relate to that. The speech continued with his asking two incredibly poignant questions that continue to impact my life- “How will you serve the world? What do they need that you can provide?”
After watching the video, I set out on a quest to make a positive impact on the world and to be of service. Through travel, entrepreneurship, and self-inquiry, I eventually discovered that the best way to be of service was to work on myself. The process ultimately helped me to realize that how we do anything is more important than what we do.
For example, in high school, when I started my organization, Radiant Revolution, I became known as “Mr. Positive.” I was eventually called out because, all the while evangelizing the value of happiness, I was continuing to use drugs to avoid embracing my pain and inner darkness. Finally, through the study of depth- psychology, I found a way to embrace my shadow side and experience directly the loving sentiments of authenticity found in Jim’s speech. For example, in Carl Jung’s “The Undiscovered Self,” I learned that when we deny the devil in ourselves, we project it out onto the world. In the most extreme sense, this meant that if we resolved our trauma and released our repressed emotions, evil in the world would cease to exist as well. It was almost to say that the world only existed as it did to reflect the pain that we carried within. I thought to myself then, that if I did the inner healing work, the world would be healed in the process, and this was enough reason for me to do the work.
I later learned that in Buddhism, there are three approaches to the process of enlightenment. The first way is that the individual goes first, then everyone follows. The second is that everyone else goes first, and then the individual follows. The third is that everyone goes at the same time. As I have embarked on the journey, I have realized that it is impossible to go alone- and that the exchanges and relationships that we have with others either liberate us or continue to entrap us. I remember the profound shift that ensued for me when I discovered the concept of Karma Yoga in the Bhagavad Gita, as well as in books like “Be Here Now” by Ram Dass. I found that through exercises of forgiveness and compassion, like imagining and smiling at the inner child of our parents, we can let go of our grief surrounding the world’s imperfect love. By letting go of fear and anger, I was better able to love the people in my surroundings and, ultimately, set myself and others free.
I had a long way to go back then, and I am continuing with my journey every day. I am happy to say that after years of releasing layers of limiting beliefs and trapped emotions, I feel like I have uncovered a deeper and more meaningful understanding of Jim’s impactful speech.
When I began searching for my true self, I came across the idea that if Heaven is the opposite of the world, then the world’s seriousness must be absent in spirit. I can imagine how, by knowing the almighty God to be your creator and by recognizing that the Earth is only a temporary abode, the struggle and strife of daily burdens might become significantly lighter. I can also imagine Jesus loving the children and dancing at weddings, The Buddha laughing, and Krishna playing his flute. Similarly, in my journey, it was only after releasing my worldly identity that I was able to tap into genuine laughter, joy, and love.
In this way, the love and humor that Jim was speaking of were far from a mask that appealed to social validation or even an encouragement to pursue comedic acting professionally but was rather an invitation to display divine authenticity.
Looking back on my attraction to Jim Carrey’s performances, and even seeing the spiritual awakening that Jim has had himself, anchors in the important truth of authenticity from a spiritual perspective. When we loosen our attachment to our earthly identities, we become more and more of a mirror to God’s perfect light and love, which, being opposite of what is found in the world, must be substantial. In the face of whatever the world throws at us, we can find our strength in the ever-expansive, ever-present joy of our true, unmasked selves.
P.S.
I also look at the joy of God as an invitation to shed the shadow of deception, whether it be Maya, the enemy, or simply this three-dimensional reality. Our greatest calling is to be joyful in spirit and to shine the light of God in all of the world’s darkest spaces. My mom would say, “The Devil won’t waste a bullet on a dead person.” Recognizing our spiritual work to liberate ourselves from shame, guilt, and fear, we step more fully into the joy of God’s Kingdom. My mom also says that ADHD truly stands for “Attention Detailed to a Higher Dimension”. On this, I completely agree.